Tales of Strude – Page 2 – some shitty haiku, made for a shittier world, see what I did there

I am a DM
never know if they like it
I try really hard

I am the sad worm
for whom the early bird tolls-
AM meetings suck

three kids throwing up
wife hacking, coughing, wheezing-
I dodge like Neo

went out on a limb
for the first time in five years
failed … was it worth it?

oh, no, missed some days
what on earth are you to do
with no crap haiku

scratching, scraping claws
sounds of a beast breaking in-
squirrel stuck in pipe

rolling, crushing waves
tossing me, destroying me
I am lost at … life

at home and at work
do not touch my goddamn stuff
you will just break it

neighbor’s going deaf
ev’ry talk outside window
sounds like violence

carbs carbs carby carbs
fucking carby carb carb carbs
jesus I am fat